Hello this is a second account ( made so I can post without using my main and giving my players spoilers for whats ahead) the group I play with is composed of 6 amazing PC’s played by equally amazing individuals( we also have a few that GM so we can rotate players and GM’s) (also all of us are good friends outside of game) this happened to be during the campaign I am currently running.
Just a short back story on the campaign to put things in context. It takes place in 2401. The players are senior staff of an Akira class starship that is part of a massive task force combining forces with the Romulans, Klingons, Cardassians and many other familiar dominant species. They have united in a massive Armada to travel into the Delta Quadrant and take advantage of the current Borgs weaken state due to their civil war and possibly wipe out the Borg all together. The 1st leg of this journey was through Kazon and Viidian space in which they encountered that the Kazon are now a super power in the sector due to unknown technological advancements under the new leadership of Grand Maj Sessen (Seska’s now adult child - half Kazon- half Cardassian) through out the system they have encountered slavery and opression including, for awhile being imprisoned themselves. Upon breaking out they were to appeal to the overseeing council of the fleet to liberate the people of this sector and bring an end to the oppression. To spice it up knowing we had some fantastic talented lyricists in the group I opened it up to the group to do the appeal in the style of “HAMILTON” AKA a cabinet battle and we had 3 willing - anyways here are the rhymes our group forgive the ones I wrote as GM it is not an area I excel at. But check out what the outcome was.
1st up was our PC Klaatu (klingon-head of security) against Utr’it (klingon defense force General)
PC: Klaatu (he did this remix/parody of the Queen song bohemian rhapsody ) :
"Are they with honor?
Or just Ptaq’s I see
Caught in a prison no escape without help you see
Honor your house, look up to kahless and seeee
I’m just a warrior I need a good death you see
Because I’m looking high, looking low, For a friend, for a foe
Any way the fight goes always always has honor for meeeeeeeeeee, for meeee
Tonight, here we stand
I grabbed my batleth when they said
There’s a glaive inside her head
That night , the fight had just begun,
And now I’ve gone and blown them allll away
The videans by our side
If they cant join us in our battle, we’ll carry on, carry on,
But they will fight with honor
At last, their time has come,
Send the phage at their spine
Bodies failing all the time
At last everybody, they’ve come to fight
Gotta leave their enemies to face the truth
Tonight, oooheoh, they don’t wanna die
A death without honor fails us all
I see a little silouetto of a man
What is that what is that is it a fighting videan
Battle armour fighting very very frightning
For their foes, for their foes
For their foes magnifico!
Theyre just videans no body loves them
Their just videans their bodies are failing them
Spare them this death with no dignity!
Easy come, easy go will you let them join us?
Without honor! No! they will not join the fight!
Without honor! No! they will not join the fight!
Without honor! No! they will not join the fight!
Will not join the fight never never never never let them join
No no no no no no
Without honor they will not go
The ptaq glaive has an evil put inside their head,
Their head, their head!!!
So you think you can fight with me at your side?
So you think you can stab me and leave me to die?
Well maybe, just send me to stovokor today
It’s a good day to die, a good day to die with our honor
Fighting with honor
Anyone can see
Videans fight with honor
Fighting with honor next to meeeeeeeeee"
The NPC retort:
I am Utr’it son of Kaang of the great house of D’Ghor
As our proverbs state we klingons are born to fight and conquer
We are taught do not kill an animal - even a predator - unless you intend to eat it
Therefore to eliminate an empire without numbers to establish our own would be remit
We are taught there is nothing shameful in falling before a superior enemy
These inhabitants of this system fought and lost, we should respect that loss and its victors honorably
For any species with honor it is better to die on your feet than live on your knees
Ones willing to toil and slave rather than die - we have no time for these
I shall end on Kahless words: if a true warrior does not fight it is because he does not breath
And so I bid my brothers in arms that we leave this sector and with our blades sheathed
Next we had our PC’ Ragnar Ook (chief engineer - Xindi primate) he went with some awsome slam poetry:
"Just stand there, while I display my argument
When I’m finished, you’ll prepare the armament
A battle, for the fate of the universe
You can sit back and listen to my Quadra-verse
If we do nothing, then we’re nothing, and there’s something that I need to say, but I don’t know if you can hear it
Tell me are you strong enough to fly with us and go against the biggest baddies in the quadrant, or are you gonna fear it?
What’s that? I just heard from the space street
You think you’re somethin’, a member of the space elite
It’s time to put, you latinum where your mouth is
Is your game, as big as your clout is?
I’ma pause now, pick your jaw off the floor
Let’s hear your side before you run out the door
The scores are in, I’m pretty sure I won
You couldn’t convince ice to melt in the hot desert sun"
And here is his NPC combatant the Cardassian high council member:
No need to get up in the presence of I : Gul Depry
Here to speak on behalf of Cardassia and her supreme sovereignty
I ask; ney I beg; pleas before you beleive the lies of these little hellyon
Please see what we see the kindness extended by these noble Kazon
The lies this intolerant crew have sewn and have tou believe
I Gul Depry stand humbly before you and attempt to unweave
See they spin tales of intelligent species oppressed and frightened
The evidence I see before me is of savages given dignity, a purpose, and been enlightened
I tell you the only thing to accuse the Kazon of is loving to hard
And that we leave this peacful aristocracy unscarred
We as Cardassians know the pain that can come when outsiders misconstrue
This is why I stand here and pour my heart out to you, and you, and you
And last we had Cher (Ocompa- captain) with an incredible freestyle:
"Do you love your families, do you crave prestige?
These ones feel this, together this dream is acheived
Brothers and sisters lets unite this fight
our dreams it seems can come true tonight
Don’t be afraid the phage has been slayed
We won’t be betrayed our end up in the grave
Tonight is the first day you will ever remember
Whether March June September December
With our phasers charged we revel in splendor
Together we will be remembered forever
Every one of us here has heard a legend and gasped
Today you can be a legend that will forever be passed
Generation to generation whatever galaxy planet or nation
You will be the cause of a brilliant revelation
No one can deny your impressive and wise decision
This battle will be won with wisdom, excellence and precision
Alone in this universe nothing can stand
don’t build a bunch beliefs on the sand
If you wanna go fast you can go it alone
If your gonna be a chump pack it up and go home
If you wanna go far then go it together
We need to go far fast and be legends forever
There comes a time in an officers life
Where they have to choose to put themselves aside
How can we say that we are worthy of pride if we are willing to let the innocent willingly die?
Have you experienced pain or ever lost the will to try? That’s where they stood before starfleet arrived.
When we took this mission we did it to save
The names of our loved ones from being chiseled on graves
But these people for years were forced to be slaves
Now we can give them hope would you take that away?
They are willing to work they are willing to fight. Many of them I trusted with my life.
9 months was nothing compared to their pain
And I will not be the cause of that starting again
This fight is not theirs, their fight is mine
If you don’t agree, then I choose to resign"
NPC opponents Starfleet command (an Aenar) and Romulan Commander
Members of this council I first want to thank you for agreeing to assemble
You all speak truth so I will attempt to nonjudgemental
And as we attempt to certify, belie, and edify
I will ask the computer to please identify the Commander of the federation fleet Admiral Syrai
And as I can feel temsions rising allow me to peovide peace of mind
By stating there ia a reason so many proverbs say that justice is blind
Liberating these people and the prime directive not upholding
Could leave us with a larger problem - and entire sextor in need of remolding
Whilewe of the federation do not condone the Kazons behaviors
If we side track our mission and resources stretch thin I fear no one will save the saviors
So in closing I vote no and before you rebut
I assure you this operation cannot afford a hiccup
And the second NPC the Romulan
I stand before you a ranking mamber of the Talshiar
Representing the interests of the vast empire united under the Romulan Star
I state name and rank - General Xerak
And ask in keeping with our customs that anything here by spoken you redact
The man who asks a question is a fool for but a moment
But the man who asks nothing spends his entire life making atonement
Before we step into this sectors politics and interfere
I ask has this counsel forgotten the true purpose of which our fleet is here
If we get involved in the personal affairs of every species we encounter
We will lack resources to do what must be done and the Borg our own systems devour
So in closing before we rush in weapons drawn and eliminate in such vigilance
The only knowledge we at this time possess is the complete extent of our ignorance
We had one other participant out of the group but he was unable to make up any rhymes so I allowed him to make a 2 min argument but i do not have his improvised argument in writing but here were his opponents
NPC Vulkan high council:
While I fail to see what 8s accomplished by such and informal caveat
But I shall still honor your cuatoms beginning with a name - you may call me Paviek
As our history shows more than most we Vulvans have an afinity toward violence
Which is why Surak in his wisdom gave us logic for our guidance
Surak tells us everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact
Everything we see, a perspective, not the truth, so observe and study before we react
The best vengence is not being like your enemy
And the best tools for freedom - logic and the temperament to converse peacfully
It is said a gem cannot be polished without friction, nor a species with out trial
And the adversities of today make us stronger and wiser and much less fragile
Surak often reminds us seld control is to strength as patience is to synergistic
So I vote we do not intercede in this sectors journey and instead give the gift if logic
And finally the Independent faction (funded by multi species but primarily the Ferengi)
Ladies and gentlemen of the council
And children of all Ages
I will make my point tactile
And attempt to not enrage
So allow me to introduce before I begin
3rs in line to Negas
Name is spelled D-E-E-G-A-N
I ask before actions so hasty surly
The council 1st consult the good book - number 193
Where it says " restlessness and discontent are the beginning of desire"
And before we interfer with races primitive and bemire
Consider our intervention could be as hazardous as providing a moth with a fire
Yes; to eliminate these denizens obstacles is not perhaps in their best interest
Look at the Hoomans - who of us stepped in to end their distress
Nuclear war, Eugenics, temporal cold war with the Xindi
And they turned out - okay - although a bit kookie
I’m a cautious Ferengi, thats how I survive
So I will end my argument at the books end number 285
And while this captain and crew may attempt to overembelish
The good book states here no good did shall ever go unpunished